"The way the ball bounces.........."

If I ever go to meet my maker, Will He able to resolve my uncertainty, His presence may clear the doubts that my adolescence carried, His charisma will prove the allure of nature. If I ever go to meet my maker, Will He define the purpose of my existence? Will He relay the emotions that went into my creation? Will He show me the way I came. If I ever go to meet my maker, Will he be able to justify a long forgotten reality? The unsighted, speechless, heedless, incapacitated, Which sin of theirs is more ungodly than mine? If I ever go to meet my maker, What did you see in him and not others? That you called him before that nightfall, father and son, Which neither him nor me had ever disapproved. If I ever go to meet my maker, Will he able to look at me with earnest, For my love was fiercer than his radiance, his darkness, Then why was I separated from my breath, the air today is yours and theirs. If I ever go to meet my maker, Why only his spit is on par with the arid? And when it...

Did i ask you the meaning for the eternal bliss of sanity, that you shed tears that drip with animosity, the waves never lied to the shore, the sun never asked for mist, i never asked for this, but it had to happen. The sounds of gong still rang in my ears, the lowering of the ancient mast of silence, i always loved her, but never did i, spat lumps on her wishes,nor desires, i loved her with a heart that lived beyond hope. Her innocence never left my soul, yet she, traitor, love withered, my feet are no longer, still, stable, her eyes glistened with love, her face, tenderness reflected, i loved her. Never have i said or done, all that i knew was that she was mine, the alarms of distance never saw me, never took me, i lay all wishes at her feet, asked her to be mine, all that i want, a preserve, she by my side. Always catered to her wishes, never ever, did i go against her wishes, i lived for her, every step saw love in her eyes, my love, she was heaven in dis...

It is not for me to be more transparent, but for you to break through my opacity - that between you and me is friendship.

The sun bid farewell to the day, The white round shone, The scene set around the lake, Crowd started settling in, One after the other, the bell rang, All laughing and joy, The big, tall, small and round, They all came to what they call A/506, The sound of the tv blared hared, The giggles and smiles, Out came the glasses, Poured in white and golden, The cards played its part, I lost all judgement, Kept playing till all, Quit and i lost, Golden kept me at bay, Saw one drop after other, Made a serious effort, To stay till last, Succeed did i most of times, This time, the balcony, lost, All its old customers, people, I looked across the balcony, waiting, For them to return.

From a dear friend, the language of the poetry is so simple and rhythmic that more than the aura of the matter, the emotions flow. Thank you for this lovely praise, so direct yet shielded from the attack of humility. I am deeply touched and may those last few lines always remain true, a humble dream that i desire.   Mr. Pillai Of course, Mr. Pillai is one of a kind, Although his actions may suggest otherwise, He actually has a very sound mind, It is not far, the time, when he shall rise. Food is his weakness, love, interest and passion, His roommates are always short of ration, His dance move is the latest sensation. He does have a way with words, He doesn’t believe, in following the herds, May not look like, but does belong to the nerds. He is even a poet, but simply doesn’t show it. For every man, there comes a moment, Beyond which he thinks it’s the end, It crosses that stage, where he does no longer lament, Believe me friend, it is never late to mend, This ...

Somewhere deep inside every line means a lot to me....so my tribute to Deep Purple.....When a Blind man cries....you know there aint a sadder tale.... If you're leaving close the door. I'm not expecting people anymore. Hear me grieving, I'm lying on the floor. Whether I'm drunk or dead I really ain't too sure. I'm a blind man, I'm a blind man and my world is pale. When a blind man cries, Lord, you know there ain't no sadder tale. Had a friend once in a room, had a good time but it ended much too soon. In a cold month in that room we found a reason for the things we had to do. I'm a blind man, I'm a blind man, now my room is cold. When a blind man cries, Lord, you know he feels it from his soul.

That day, when the dark set in, i poured the last of my Jack into a steel tumbler and dropped two cubes into it, not knowing how this day was going to change the way i viewed life. The road less travelled is what i chose over those hundreds of known ways, i hesitated only once, then never till today and probably never again. Fun for me was those numerous occasions where the balcony shook faith, alcohol evoked emotions and smoke channeled sources, little did i know that fun was also prevalent in those times you spent with people with whom you connected. The connection here is beyond friendship, a little less than life but full of life. One little problem with my attitude towards life, i engage deep in relationships and then i hurt them, some stay while others pack their bags. But one thing is for sure, if i have ever spoken to you, you have found a place in my heart. Goodbyes and Farewells are for those who willingly or unwillingly wish to part, my spirits remain entwined in those s...

Ask any man, what is that one thing that has the capability of moving this otherwise resolute piece of creation that has withstood the test of age; his reply would definitely include his love for his son or daughter. Time has proved this again and again, be it the high profile politician, the terrifying underworld don, the common man who shares lots of common faces or even the poverty stricken peasant that children bring them joy and they are ready to go to any extent to fulfill their wishes. Living in such a family oriented environment, you can predict the enormous pressures on the youth of this country nearing marriageable age. I happen to be one of them, one of the very youth who wishes to hide their face behind the thousands of marriage ready off the shelf market products. I don’t see the need for marriage, I always thought it was my childishness but now that I have grown up, I still linger with the same thought. What made me take such a decision, I don’t know. You can always rea...

As far as my memory can go, I remember being welcomed into the homes of my relatives and kin’s. I made Mumbai my primary domain only from 2003, till then I was a regular visitor, or rather a regular guest. Before 2003, I visited Mumbai during my school holidays for roughly 2-3 days, where I stayed at my aunt’s place. The visit was hectic, with many places to visit and time so regulated and limited. Every relative missed no chance to pour out their sorrows eying the hard earned money that my father parted with ease. The most memorable of the visit was the journey. Before Netravati, the only way of coming to Mumbai was through the Kanyakumari Express (Jayanti Janta), a 2 day journey. The train initially soared through the urbanized (though moderate) cities of Kerala, then through the nature blessed mountains of Palakad, a border town of Kerala, before going through various other states. The train used to be buzzing with life, crippled children sweeping the floors, poverty stricken chil...

Working on this new work, "If i ever go to meet my maker". Hope to publish it soon...really feeling good about this particular work.

Seek no path beyond, Spare no words of praise, I serve the saint of friendship, walk around the souls of trust.

I climbed the stairs of perpetual reality, To find her leading the way, Her lure drew the pull in me, I trailed the golden path without a query. She showed me those early days, Days where play and fun prevailed antagonistic struggle for victory, Days where I cried to earn love, Days where I laughed at being touched. The golden path, she said, led to divinity, I breathe the air of purity, Saw my deeds being blessed, Soon I forgot to count the sin that I committed. The path then showed me my teens, Where I learnt the toughest word, Love, I dreamt, lived, and shared this knowledge, To find that teachers never get their share of praise. Then I saw her, she now led the way, Her charisma bought tears, Her smile bought me close to eternity, Her presence made me redraw the Vitruvian. She departed for the lands unknown, I vowed to unite soon, To be with her among the valleys of paradise, The ecstasy I yearned fortified my desire. Errands to be run, delayed my ascen...

I prayed for mercy before the almighty, His silhouette stared back at me, Helpless were his hands, The human creation bowed down before me. His houses everywhere, Demons and gods, All housed in the same shrine, I peeped in for help, despair. I slit across the vein that held my breath, The pain drenched my hopes, I implored for relief, For a moment, I hesitated, because, her, I was not yet ready to die. Memoirs of days gone, brought a smile, In the dead of the night, this wasn’t early, The gaffe, I regret, but none could be done, Because death couldn’t wait for me.

Dont remember when i wrote this, but somewhere in my teens......... Little birds chirped, along the ole ally, a man, sexagenarian, sat under a papaya tree. His hand crumbled, years of work, none that saved, his state still suffers. His hand wet the soil, sweat and water, can't discriminate, yet he kept going. The small clan, of neighbouring village boys, zoomed past him, sped like a rocket, His eyes trying, but in vain, trace the faces, of youth in them. He waited, kept waiting, all day along, his stomach ailed, none approached it. He dreamt of a penny, to fill his tummy, But almighty, hesitated, maybe time to go. Cycles sped, and there alas, chain came off, his mouth spread, grin enlarged. He held his stick, in air so high, none other than Hitler, might have felt, after the war, He crippled, but stood, firm, his dignity untouched, always lived on his own, yet forgot, he was all alone. He marched to the cycle, stooped and picked ...

I welcome solitude with arms wide open. Long time since i have been ignoring him. I need to spend some time with him. See you folks soon. Its only a visual disappearance, decibels stay.

Vaidya : Arre, why don't you try to go the United States? There you can work anywhere and no one from the village will know where you work, so you see no shame. Kishore : Ya that is true, i read somewhere plumbers get paid paid more than the Indian president. Vaidya : You should have told me this long back, I wasted five years of my son. He is in the fifth standard now!!!!!

Ajith Pillai quite beautifully imagines an India where everything is Dollar priced. After reading the article i was quite surprised and at the same time interested in the thought. After spending almost a year in the United States, it definitely feels like goods and commodities priced in Dollars apparently appears to be more cheap. Rightly pointed out in the article, it is ought to be with the numbers. Goods priced in dollars seem too small a price to believe.

she spelled the blossom of love in me............ she sucked the nectar of life from me......... she held my hand in the crowed street....... she left my soul in a deserted lane.....

I fear the light that made me perceptible, I fear the darkness that concealed my sentiment, I fear the colors that illuminated my existence, I fear the elation that makes me overlook grief.

Searching among the last remains of Rubia, I stumbled upon the inscriptions of Raima, The words printed in bold, smeared in parfum, My eyes rigid on the sketch of love, Rubima. Set when the women were young, They held an affiliation too close, Fear in their eyes, dampness in their breath, They met behind the barn near the cellar. The creeping vine, a safe haven, from the observer, They engaged in recreation that the society turned their back on, They explored the thinness between their clothes, They shared the revelation that once stayed with them. They searched catlike, they squeezed with ease, They bared to illustrate felony of law, They undressed with nothing to hide, They exposed their better parts, with emotions untainted. They slowly moved to mutualism, They shared belongings not meant to be though, They sensed the need though the fear loomed, Yet the old barn kept the worship undeterred. They painted castles on the barn fence, With colors unknown, they ...

Vaidya : Arre Kishore, You dont have to worry, you will get a job soon. Kishore: Ya right. Vaidya : What is happening with your girl, that Gulshan's Daughter. Kishore: I left her long back, she was a pain in the ass. All the time cribbing about being together. Even i have a life, need some dignity. I cannot be a hen-pecked husband, so i left her fearing the future. Vaidya : I don't understand you. You were behind her for two years and then when you finally get her, you don't want her anymore. Kishore: Just because i like to play poker, the thrills associated with it, Don't expect me to buy a casino!!!!!

whistling through the woods, the dame smelt life, the voice shared gamut, the creatures ambit. the green in yellow, dark and light, pasted against blue, bath in white. climbers threw its majesty, shrubs shrunk in shame, roots withered earth, gracefully did she accept. trees stood aloof, promised no sunshine, against the lullaby wishes, of new entrants. rain,came smearing, with hope and joy, she splashed on her, both gleamed with joy. streams broke its way, shaped its route, flew past creatures, to see them soon. purity sanctified, glorified, heavenly odour, glistening, voice unparalleled ,sound unheard, her magic still stayed in the air. MOTHER, did i name her, her name needs to be called, she ought to be this, else i wouldn't have been here.

Vaidya: Oh my brother, Kishore where were you? Long time, Hows Life. Kishore: Arre, I was in Mumbai searching for a job. I graduated last month. Remember i had gone for my engineering degree. Vaidya: Oh yes, i remember the entire village giving you a grand farewell before you left for Mumbai. I had sold 42 Vada Pav's that day, record you know for Kalijungh. Kishore: We can talk about that later, Do you know anyone who can get me a job? Vaidya: Are you joking, I know no one. The only person i know who left the boundaries of this village is you. Why, you didn't get a job in Mumbai? Didn't your college get you a job? Kishore: Companies come to campuses to pick students who are sure to break the bond!!!!!So i didn't get one.

A very old initiative, it is gossip corner for Kishore and Vaidya. Kishore is an engineering graduate in search of a job and Vaidya is his childhood friend who runs a stall near the Kalijungh market. The upcoming snippets will be some real life situations that they discuss over tea and Vada Pav.

Dead China Man I walked through the lonely roads of dead china man, Seeing things that I never perceived, Feeling the temperature climbing the vine, I played the flabiol of cobla. People stared at misery, though they had no share, Pitied as though they cared, Never cared to empty their penny, For a man who longed for sympathy. The shades of the cork tree, Mellowed down the rays, But the parched throat, strained, Water was the only elucidation. Set out in search for a stream, Amidst the arid deserts of dead china man, Barren, scorched, bone-dry, Not a drop to see, water. Desolation, despondency, I stop the hunt, For a three quarter treasure, Anticipated, feared the end looming too close, Dream did I of an ancient potion, concoction. Think did I of the lady who died to let me live, Sorry was the only apology that I held for her, Didn’t know how it would matter, Nevertheless, carried it around, as a hair shirt. As they say, held on to my horses, hoping, So...

A long journey, it was………. 4 years that went so fast, still wish that I was there in those corridors, quadrangle, baddy courts; canteen……..can’t forget those memories……. And then I meet all of you…never even expected to make friends...there are days when I used to cry to go back….I never felt anyone understood me…I always felt lonely…..I was never known for what I was…. So I decided to change…..change for good but unfortunately not the right way…..I started smoking, drinking and trying to get into groups….very soon people started recognizing me……there it was…exactly what I wanted …..got stuck in fights and all wrong places ……I spoiled my life….. I was never like this...all those people who knew me before will definitely agree….but I have no regrets…..I failed to realize why……and this is true….. I want to thank all who helped me through the greatest trauma of my life…..once again……

Last night, I saw a dream, if taken literally, I saw it so it is a dream, if taken figuratively, I am happy I saw a dream. Confusing jumble of words isn’t it. Epicurus once said “Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” Probably the superlative of Hope is Dream; this state of mind is perhaps the most satisfying among all joys and sorrows. Some would definitely not agree, for the scary nightmares that they see in their sleep. So what exactly do you dream, no one really has control over it. (Radhika won’t agree). It shows you faces that you always longed to be, pictures you wished to paint, songs you wished to sing, see places far away, play roles you wanted to be and what not. My dreams have taken me to the farthest corner of my kitchen to the Inca city of Machu Picchu, from the coliseum of Rome to the shady beaches of Mauritius, the Oprah Winfrey show to the Sydney Opera house and place...

Weird, the start was weird, Strangers meeting strangely, I met her, chirpy, full of life, There starts the get along, Met and again met, Through people, through friends, Slowly started to get to know, The person behind the clouds. Stupid, persistent, yet sweet, Lively, vigorous, yet lethargic, Animated, spirited yet passive, Joy, sorrow, and love. Read did she vigorously, Write did she exquisite, Speak she did stunningly, Love she did charmingly. She wandered into the wilds, Where a shot never mattered, The anxious facets of matter, Played her sonata, Masterpiece of liberty, No preconceptions, Nor rigid, her voice, Modeled the flow of essence. Her voice shadowed the curse, Her words played melody, Her writings so simple, yet intricate, She saw life the way we couldn’t. The moon took retreat, Failed to realize the darkness, Nights stretched to days, An escape to insanity. Utter, did we on all, Sane or irrational, Talk did we for ages, Every ta...

Little did I imagine the nuances of life, Could be stranger than reality, A friend, his friend and finally my friend, Little did I realize the value of relations. Tucked in the corner of a space, Eyes scanned her through, Small, lesser, little, minor, Was all I could think. Petite, her nature, blew the horns, Strength flowed out, Her presence overshadowed her courage, It really did mark the start of a journey. The dim lights spared no thought, Her eyes said something, Stronger than the way I saw her, Her aura started filling the arena. She held no ties to me, A very casual, yet intriguing meet, As the day progressed, my priorities played on, I decided to bid farewell. Time swayed fro and fro, Connections lost, relations weakening, The water stood between, I flew across to land abroad. The medium of modern talks, Made me reconnect to people, Specially with her, a friend, She let it flow, the pain, the agony. Her words weighed a ton, Her mind about to...