"The way the ball bounces.........."

Is it possible to quantify happiness? The different events that have occurred in my life over the past twenty-six years seem to hold a few cherish-able events. Now the question arises so as to rank them in the order of happiness. I don't seem to have a formula or an equation to project the rank. So is it going to be the day i got my first gift or the first time i topped the class or the first time i fell in love or the first time i felt proud of my achievement or the day when i graduated or when i got my first job. There definitely seems to be a pattern: first, but which out of them still remains a mystery. Repeating and achieving the same feat again and again does not necessarily make you happy, maybe more confident but doing it for the first time surely does. The first always seem to gather attention, the days when i boasted about my first love, first kiss, i surely felt elevated, so did my friends who heard me out(envious though). A la...

I decided. I decided not to tamper with what is there and let the waves flow the way they were meant to be. I am no supreme over others. Everyone has a right and in the integrity of humanity I respect that. I wish that the same emotions be reciprocated.

“I can see the end”, I reassured myself. The white satin and the typical disinfectant smile never helped lift my spirits. It was almost there – Death. I wasn’t afraid of death so I really had no issues with the entire scene. I rerun the seasons of life the same way I used to watch soaps. I was wrong everywhere. “I want to die soon”, I bragged among several others. Some ridiculed it while others envied the thought. Some tried to shake sense into me while others accepted it as my cry for attention. But nonetheless I wanted it so bad, that I tried to write sorrow into my life. I rewrote those hundreds of joyous events into sad disasters. Events where all I had to do was be there for them and I chose not to, so that I can cry over the loss and regret the mistake. Close friends took it as ego while others pitied me, but it worked according to the plan. Some ditched me while others wore silence but everyone expressed their dislike. The first burst of pain bruised the ego and swept...

“Spring blossomed at the foothills of solitude, The caves were lit once again, for the feast, That bid adieu, to the joyous smiles of yesteryear, Invited none, seek none, for once again his soul is above all.”